Friendships....then and now.Ok, it is time for me to make a statement. As you can see by the headline, Friendship is the topic. Here is my statement: No matter who a new friend is they will never be as loyal as a friend you made when you were younger.
Case in point. I have had some really good friends in my life, #1 being my sister, Tina. We have always been friends and would most likely have been friends even if we weren't sisters. We are just built the same way, personality wise. About 6 years ago, when Kaleigh was in her first year of preschool, I met someone who seemed to be very much like me. Loved to laugh, joke around, liked the same things as I did and loved her kid to death! We got along and had playdates for the kids joking about how her son may some day marry my daughter and wouldn't it be lovely if that happened. Now I am not so sure. She would probably be late to the wedding, forget the rehearsal dinner, call and cancel for the showers and talk on her cell phone during the ceremony!
What I am trying to say is, when I say, "Hey let's meet somewhere for lunch" or "do you want to sit together for this seminar?" I mean it, I will be there and on time! This friend treats these questions as a "if I feel like it I will be there", or "sure, if nothing better comes up". Of course this is not what she says, she says something more like this (as I am waiting at the restaurant), "oh, you know we were up late last night and I just didn't sleep well, can we do this another time?" or "I am so sorry, I totally forgot about ******'s soccer game, I will have to pass this time." Or then there is always the nothingness. I expect her to be someplace, call her phone, no answer, I leave a message, no call back, no show and no explanation. I mean hey, I could be off the mark sometimes but not every time. She might have been in an accident, and I would feel bad if that happened. What I am trying to say is there have been too many non-accident excuses if you know what I mean. I don't think she purposely tries to be mean, I think she is too busy carting her child to different activities, she has so many shallow friends that she does stuff with that she can't make time for everyone. I don't think I am the only one she lets down either, and that should make me feel better, but it doesn't. I have other friends too that I have made in more recent years and it seems as though none seem to stick like those in the past did.
I still have friends from 20-25 years ago that I still have as much fun with and can rely on more than my newer friends, and here is the key, even though I see them only about 2 times a year!
Now, some of you may say, well there you are, you expect too much from these other friends, you only see your other friends 2 times a year! Well, that is only a distance problem. Every wedding, every bridal shower, baby shower, big birthday etc, I still invite the old friends and the new. Who do you think shows up every time? The new friends that I talk to all the time? No.
The old friends who care enough to take time out of their lives to make me and mine feel special.
There is something wrong with the new generation of friends, regardless of age. Too many people have "contacts" that they not only "network" with but have over just so they can say they had them over! True friendships are rare these days and I personally wish that those that have moved away from here, wouldn't have, because I miss them terribly and I don't seem to be able to recapture that bond that friends should have despite stupid cell phones and busy schedules! Ok, I really have made myself depressed. Oh well....such is life....for now.